paul

Jean Paul Gaultier Le Male

Posted on by elemonated

I have a feeling that many a person is going to disagree with me on this very vehemently.

Ah, well. Can’t be worse than my Valentino Uomo review! I’m honestly feeling particularly grumpy because I’m in pain at the moment for full disclosure, but I don’t really think being in a better mood would really effect my impression on the fragrance.

Sometimes though I do wish I had dedicated a little more time to the fragrance before writing; I don’t absolutely dislike Uomo, for instance, on myself anymore, and now appreciate the sweetness and syntheticness (and I promise, that wasn’t a sarcastic statement.) This time, I’ve put on Le Male twice now over the past few weeks and spritzed my boyfriend with it, so I think I’m as warmed up to it as I could be.  Read More

Zoologist Perfumes: Panda

Posted on by elemonated

Panda! My favorite. Or, kind of. I like wearing this one, but Rhinoceros is much more my speed in terms of mates. Pheromones! Eheh.

Zoologist Perfumes
Panda

Wet: broken fresh bamboo, wet leaves, cedar, lilies, musk
Dry: wet leaves, cedar, sugarcane, water, musk, osmanthus, lilies, sandalwood, citrus

It reminds me of Black March at the beginning, but becomes way more assertive and green. It reminds me of what nature-purified water smells like. Like the stuff a high school friend used to bring down from Lake George, which she was in love with, and made us drink to prove to us the purity of the water year after year. Watery, green, hits the back of the throat the way a fresh-water aquarium does. Slightly sweet. It reminds me of biology, but much more pleasant; more happily catching tadpoles with classmates than coming back after Thanksgiving break to find that your Ph.D Animal Behavior teacher is a high school teacher for a reason (seriously, he could have at least read up about it on the internet before killing like three quarters of them by accident.)

Zoologist Perfumes Review: Rhinoceros

Posted on by elemonated

I apologize in advance. This one ends a little weird.

Rhinoceros Eau de Parfum

Zoologist Perfumes
Rhinoceros

Wet: leather, tobacco, rum
Dry: leather, sage, vetiver, smoke, oud, ginger

I kind of want to bite my arm now. Something about the bitterness of it taps the back of my throat and makes my mouth water. It doesn’t even necessarily smell like it would taste good. I just want to taste it. The rum at the beginning was sharp and obvious, and it left quickly, which is good because I wasn’t trying to smell like an alcoholic, though it was interesting while it was there. Now it smells like new leather, not broken in yet. It’s definitely a hot, shimmering smell, but I can’t identify any of the flowers or the sweet sandalwood so much as they add the shimmering dimension, I think. It makes me feel the way oppressing heat does. I still want to eat my arm. Okay I kissed it. I’m now mildly turned on and my lips taste like soap. And I totally get the flowers now.

At this point I sprayed my arms with Demeter’s Beeswax and gave them a scrub as to smell less like I was in a threesome and more like I’m a weird scent lady. The consequences of which are much less harsh, as my roommates will then only rib me for being obsessive and not grill me on whom I slept with while they were out of the room. Beaver takes it on, while Rhinoceros absolutely swallows it. This is probably because Beaver was on my skin longer, as I did the reviews two hours apart. The Beeswax kills the castoreum and cleans up the scent a ton. Rhinoceros isn’t affected in the least. I think maybe the floral pokes its head out a tiny bit more, but I could just be imagining it.